Slippery when wet
by Jeanne Reynolds
I love proofreading.
I know that’s weird. I mean, it’s like admitting you love folding laundry or cleaning the cat’s litter box. Boring, tedious and mostly unappreciated.
But for me, the challenge is exhilarating. In any given document, there’s a really good chance there’s a typo, misplaced punctuation mark or missing word in there somewhere, and I’m going to find it. Game on!
Like this one I saw painted on the side of a furniture store van:
40% off major bands
(Maybe it’s not a typo. Maybe the store has a side business rivaling Ticketmaster or Papa Jazz.)
Then there’s the twisted fun of spotting misplaced modifiers that provide entertaining new meanings. Check out this collection of thought-provoking signs someone collected:
- Caution heavy pedestrian traffic.
- Caution pedestrians slippery when wet.
- Huge kids sale.
- Kids with gas eat free.
- Kids 20% off.
- Don’t let worries kill you. Let the church help.
- Bathroom only for disabled elderly pregnant children.
- This door is alarmed.
- Tables are for eating customers only.
Ha ha, we’d never make those mistakes, right? Not so fast. I won’t tell you where these came from (mostly because I don’t know) but I’m willing to bet we’ve all seen similar gems cross our desks:
- After eating all their food, we put the dogs outside.
- I found a huge boulder taking a walk in the woods.
- We saw cotton growing from our car window.
- Jack wore a gold man’s watch.
- Dipped in chocolate, my kids love pretzels.
- Tired of cleaning yourself? Let Merry Maids do it.
- The mayor discussed the high cost of living with several women.
You see, proofreading really can add joy and laughter to your life. Just be sure to ask a colleague for a second set of eyes on your work to make sure the joke’s not on you.
Jeanne Reynolds is director of corporate communications & media relations at Colonial Life and an IABC/SC Board Member.